Perfectionism – What Causes it and How To Stop Doing It

Perfectionism – understanding how it happens

 

Perfectionism

It doesn’t work

It’s been a really interesting day – I’ve been meaning to write this for some time as it’s a common problem –  perfectionism! And here’s what happened to me today that links to this prescription:

I’ve recently discovered Blab which is a SM channel to do talks and interviews and the lady that helped me to write my book – Jacquie Malpass – wanted to interview me about  my book and new course (Blatant plug coming up – http://onelife-lifecoaching.co.uk/product/mindset-for-business-success-system/)

Anyway, we started with half an hour to spare and the sound didn’t work and the video was intermittent and neither of us had much idea about how to use it – we have learned from this experience, honest! We eventually started 20 minutes late and really enjoyed the experience! We had 18 people on the call, shared some information about my book, my course and my services and also did a live coaching session with someone that wanted to earn a large amount of money by providing financial advice to older people and couldn’t start his marketing. He was saying that he couldn’t find the right person, he didn’t have the right strategy so he couldn’t start. Wow – how timely!

It also takes me back to the videographers in the community that tell me I’m doing my business harm by putting out sub-standard videos. Maybe I am, but my purpose is to help everyone to reach their full potential and that would take a lot of money  to reach everyone! If I took notice of my imperfections, I tend to get stuck!

What causes perfectionism?

  • Events from the past where we’ve been criticized or things have gone wrong or we have been embarassed
  • Wish to live up to people’s expectations and even mind-reading what they expect
  • Thinking that we are not good enough
  • A fear of failure or of success
  • Not being ourselves
  • Negative people around us

 

So what are the solutions?

  • Surround yourself with A people – your true supportersst
  • Be confident about your Big Why – what are you doing the activity for?
  • Let go of any past events that make you worry about failure or success – it’s disabling and you can get very stuck and lose confidence and money!
  • Develop an empowering belief that connects you to your why – your purpose
  • Set some empowering goals
  • Just start and learn from the experience – after all, you are depriving people from getting to know you or your services and benefit from them

 

Here’s a set of 4 questions that you may have heard me use before that clarify the consequences of your behaviour.

  1. What would happen if you did take action?
  2. What would happen if you didn’t take action?
  3. What wouldn’t happen if you did take action?
  4. What wouldn’t happen if you didn’t take action?

Write down the answers to the above questions, ask yourself if you need help to move on and get in touch with me if you do!

Also remember that my on-line course is available at http://onelife-lifecoaching.co.uk/product/mindset-for-business-success-system/ and at the moment is half price – just 3 payments of £33. If you are reading this after the end of the offer, just e-mail me and I’ll give you a voucher code to get it at the price it is today!

Here’s to Imperfect Action!

Dr Bridget

 

 

 

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