Really Understanding Goal Setting

Really Understanding Goal Setting

Goal Setting

Goal

We’ve all been there – we set goals at various times of the year and then expect them to miraculously happen and that’s because we haven’t set them properly. Your conscious mind sets goals but it is your unconscious mind that gets them and that’s really important because your unconscious mind is there to protect you and if it has any doubts or is unclear about the goal in any way, it’s not going to happen. Watch the video and then set a goal for yourself for this time next year.

The important things to consider as you write your goal are:

  • Projecting yourself into the future – your unconscious mind will think that it is real when you say “It’s the  1st February 2020 ( or whatever the date will be ) and I am ………..
  • Make the goal positive – what you want rather than what you don’t want
  • Make sure that you can start the goal and maintain it. If someone else is part of how you get your goal and they change their mind, you will not get your goal, so set a goal that is your part of it
  • Be specific – your unconscious mind is generally lazy and will be do the minimum if you don’t specify what you really want.
  • Involve all your senses – write down what you feel, what you see, what you hear and what you say to yourself when you have the goal
  • Make sure it is ecological – so is it OK in your world for you to have this goal? If I put that I was going to travel the world, then it would not be ecological because I like my home and want to be there.
  • Make sure that it increases choice for you
  • Make sure that is is a whole life goal – it includes all aspects of your life that are important to you.

And then every day ask yourself these 2 questions – What did I do yesterday to get my goal? and what will I do today to get my goal?

I’ve attached a pdf here – Goal setting  – which includes how to set a goal and also my most recent goal

So create a goal as soon as you can and if you have any difficulty doing that, either because you don’t understand the process, or you have doubts, get in touch and we can do a free 1/2 hour to find out how to overcome the blocks.

If you’d like to join my STRETCH mastermind to help you get these goals, have access to experts and accountability, the details are here.

Until next week- Make this your best year yet!

Dr Bridget – setting goals with ease

New year New Questions

Questions

Questions

As a coach, I feel it’s “my job” to ask a question that really makes a huge difference to someones life – to their perspective, to their understanding of themselves and something that they haven’t asked themselves before. So I thought I’d share some questions with you that you won’t have asked yourself before.

As we move into the New Year, here are the questions to get you really thinking.

  1. What are you best at? Starting things, changing things or stopping things (not finishing but ending when appropriate)? And then-
  2. What are you worst at? Starting things, Changing things or Stopping things?

So take the answer to the worst at question and write it down. Now watch the video and answer the questions below.

 

Research has shown that:

People who are worst at starting things have trouble being who they want to be.

People who are worst at changing things have trouble doing what they want to do

People who are worst at stopping things have trouble having what they want to have

So look at what you are worst at and ask the appropriate question:-

Starting things: “Who is it that you are not being that you want to be?”

Changing things “What is that you are not doing that you want to do?”

Stopping things “What is it that you don’t have that you want to have?”

From my perspective. I’m worst at stopping things and when I ask myself “What is it that I don’t have that I want to have?” I come up with things like Excitement and Purpose (must work on those things then)

What have you come up with when you ask yourself the relevant question? Once you know, then ask yourself the reason for that. Let me know if you have any questions and if you’d like to know more about my training courses or personal breakthrough coaching, get in touch here

See you next week

Dr Bridget – always on your side!

Does Life Get in Your Way?

Does Life Get in  Your Way

Life

Is Life in Your Way

I’ve been talking with quite a lot of people recently about their journey to success and getting unstuck. And generally, they have been really useful conversations. Yesterday, I rung someone who wanted to speak to me and they didn’t answer, and I thought it strange as they’d been through a process to book an appointment with me – (by the way, you can do this as well by clicking here). And you know how you mind read in these situations:-

  • Maybe they forgot it was dinner time
  • Maybe the kids played up
  • Maybe they had some doubts whether it was worth speaking to me – perhaps they were really stuck and got scared
  • Or may be life just got in the way

I will probably never know  but it made me think about how many opportunities we may miss because of “life” and it inspired this blog.

Watch the video below and then think about the examples below and the tool I give you to help you make the decisions

Some examples –

  • Maybe you’ve been invited to a networking event or other event and you were just too tired and then wondered whether you should have gone
  • Maybe someone said to you “why are you going to do that?”
  • Maybe you got caught up in other people’s should’s and ought to’s and just gave up?
  • Maybe you had to do the shopping or ironing?

Did you end up regretting your decision? Did you miss an opportunity?

Or maybe these thoughts came to your mind:-

  • It doesn’t feel right
  • Its not going to get me my goals
  • It’s not relevant to me

I suggest you find a piece of paper and draw a line down it vertically half way across. On one side you write “What if I did?” and on the other side, write “What if I didn’t?” And fill the answers in. You’ll soon be thinking this for any decision that you take. And you won’t miss important opportunities by letting life get in  your way.

Until next week, look out for those opportunities in life and If you’d like to talk to me about getting out of your own way book a free appointment.

Dr Bridget

Creating Time for your Future

Creating Time for Your Future

Creating Time

Creating Time

The results were amazing – there was a slight issue that needed to be tackled though and it was a fairly obvious one to me.

So my client was fully focused on increasing his business turn over by 10 fold after getting all of the negatives out of his head with a breakthrough intensive coaching session with me. It was obvious what was happening as he  was very tired as well as very busy (and well on his way to his target). When I started asking him specifics about the progress, it turned out that he had not taken time out to evaluate, plan and congratulate himself on a regular basis. He didn’t really know how much business he had brought in the previous week and how many new clients he had or even worked out a plan for the next week. And he couldn’t look after himself as well as he wanted because he was so busy. And this busyness, and the solution, applies to people wanting to be successful in a career, in a relationship and in life in general. Watch the video below and let me know what happens when you start to do this yourself.

Here’s my suggestion:
Work out when you can take an hour out of being busy in the week, on a regular basis, to get clarity and plan

  • Put it on your diary right now!
  • Get clarity about your goal
  • Decide what you are going to measure
  • Produce a plan for the next week and work out how you will monitor that
  • Think about your progress towards your goal
  • Treat yourself if you have done what you said you were going to do – something meaningful

Let me know how it goes and the insights that you have from doing this

If you are struggling, book a slot with me to talk about it – it may be what you’ve needed all along.

My Facebook closed group, called One Step Closer is also a place where you can discuss these issues with people who may be experiencing similar challenges.

See you next week

Dr Bridget

 

Are You an Action Taker or a Reflector?

Are You an Action Taker or a Reflector?

Action

Action v Reflection

I remember that I used to leap into things – well I still do –  and sometimes regretted being that action taker. On the whole though, I would say I’m happy with being one. On my journey towards business success, I have found taking action really useful but have been very frustrated by those who need time to reflect. In fact, I have had to stop working with people who reflect a lot because I find that they frustrate me ( I may well need them though in reality.) I’ve also spent quite a bit of money by diving into things and taking quick action.

One of our unconscious filters is meta programmes and one of these is whether you are an action taker or a reflector. Because these are very unconscious, you may not be aware of them and just notice the results. One of my aims in doing these prescriptions is to raise awareness of what is happening for you and whether it is useful or not.

Watch the video below and then reflect on which you are.


So here is the question ” When you come into a situation, do you take action or do you stop and reflect ?”

Or, are you somewhere in between?

Have a think about which you are and whether other people around you are different or not. Ask  yourself whether you need people around you who take action or people who reflect before acting?

If you would like to learn more about how you work internally and work out what other people’s model of the world is, you might like to come on an NLP course and start to understand yourself and others – it’s totally life changing!

Until next week, have fun!

Dr Bridget

REDUCING THE STRESS AMONG BUSINESS OWNERS AND DIRECTORS

A GOOD and clear mindset is fundamental in running a business but the publication on Thursday of a

Dr Bridget Kirsop at the Principality Stadium in Cardiff

major document opening the window on mental health in the workplace showed that not everyone in business has this.

The Thriving At Work report says mindset issues are often taboo subjects in the workplace because of employees fears that they will lose their job if they reveal to an employer they have mental health problems.

For small business owners as well, stress-related mental health issues can be the difference between paying the mortgage that month and not.

Indeed, many SME owners and directors think they have to work through the pain to get by. But investing in personal development to cope with stressful situations is the best route to mental wellness.

Dr Bridget Kirsop, one of South Wales’ leading Certified NLP Master Coaches and Trainers, has worked with hundreds of sole traders, partnerships, business directors and company owners to improve their mindset and teach them to cope when any big negative which comes along.

Through her NLP and Mastermind groups, Dr Bridget installs positivity to the individual’s thinking which then transfers to their sub-conscious mindset.

And it is the right time for businessmen and women to take stock of themselves with Christmas approaching and the stressful rush towards reaching targets in the weeks before the festive break.

With National Stress Awareness Day taking place on November 1, Dr Bridget, who is hosting new Mastermind and NLP sessions in January and has a new website packed with information, said: “A stressed mindset completely hinders a business’ development at a fundamental level.

“When you are dealing with complicated issues within a company but have the noise of other problems competing for space within your head, that is not going to help you, the people working with you or your clients.

“Every business has stress at times, but there are NLP techniques to help alleviate these periods and steer you back on the right route.”

So serious has the issue of stress and mental health become that the Thriving At Work report says that a sixth of the UK population in the work ages of 16 to 64 suffer from some kind of mental health issue.

These issues can be anything from slight stress over some workplace situation to depression and, says the report, the problems are on the increase.

Dr Bridget added: “I have worked with a number of business people who have gone through these situations and have helped them to regain their confidence, build their resilience and help them control the fears and anxieties they have experienced.

“When ask a business person how things are going, the general reply is ‘great’ but behind the mask, they may be suffering. I remove the negative and help them to take control of their business and personal lives again.”

For more information about how Dr Bridget Kirsop can help your mental health issues, look in the different sections of this website.

How to do a Vision Board and Why

How to do a Vision Board

Vision Board

Dr B’s Board

I’m guessing that most of you have done a vision board at some stage in your life- whether that was a scrap book when you were young or in a workshop or just for fun! and doing one is extremely powerful! The action of doing a vision board means that you have committed to looking at your life in all aspects and also that you want to get motivated and celebrate. I often run sessions with my mastermind group and recently joined in and did one myself – you can see it in the picture above. It has given me focus and daily reminders of what I am doing in my business and also why – very important.

Watch the video below and then find out how to do one.

What you can do a vision board about:

  • Who you are
  • Where you want to travel to
  • Memories of previous events
  • Your life or business goals
  • Anything really
Vision Board

Vision Board

How do you do one:

  • Get a canvas board or similar
  • Maybe find other people that want to do one
  • Get a wide variety of pens, paint and other stationary (love stationary shopping!) – I have also used pasta in one of mine
  • Buy or borrow magazines – a wide variety of subjects and find some scissors and glue
  • Remind yourself of your goals
  • Work out what motivates you – your values and what you believe- empowering beliefs

And then just start and see what happens- make it fun!

Let me know when you have done a vision board and what you discovered about yourself by doing it- its usually loads

Then make sure you have it somewhere where it inspires you every day!

Examples of other boards done by my mastermind group:

Go for it and let me know how you get on!

If you’d like to join a mastermind group and develop yourself to develop your business, contact me here

Dr Bridget

 

 

How to make your weaknesses work for you

 How to Make your Weaknesses Work for You

Weaknesses

Strengths and Weaknesses

I was quite surprised when I found out what my strengths are and also it enabled me to do some work on what things that work less well for me. Here’s a link to my strengths video and a video on my weaknesses below. They are about self care and organisation.

I’m pretty determined to work with my weaknesses so that they become strengths and help me get my goals.

If I look after myself and become organised, I’m pretty sure that this will help me hugely and I’ve known that for a long time. So I’m on a clean food diet and also have committed to spending 1/2 hour a day tidying the house and office

Let me know your weaknesses and how you are going to turn them around. Let me know if you’d like me to help you in any way by ringing 07973 635102 or contacting me here.

I’m running a Master Mind group in January which would be of help if you are in the S Wales area and will be running an on-line mastermind group soon – watch this space!

Until next week – turn them into strengths!

Dr Bridget

What are you Never Going To Do? Boundaries

What are your Boundaries – what will you never do?

I was reading an article recently which talked about the things that the author was never going to do. I’d never really thought about that  before and found it really useful to make a list of things that I am never going to do. Since doing that, I’ve made some quite big changes and passed on some opportunities which I didn’t feel good about. These things weren’t about confidence or self esteem as I think I’m pretty OK with those, but just made me clearer on what my boundaries are and will be in the future – very useful!

Watch the video and then ask yourself the questions below and then come up with a list:

Questions

  • What makes you feel bad?
  • What doesn’t feel right?
  • Which people don’t get you
  • Who is always questioning what you do?
  • Who are your mood hoovers?
  • When can’t you be yourself?

Sometimes people struggle with their boundaries and want to please others or are afraid of the consequences of not doing something that they used to do. The 2 questions that I always ask myself in this scenario are:

What if you did?

What if you didn’t?

Create a list of what you are Never Going To Do – whey hey – that’s liberating isn’t it!

And let me know what’s on your list in the comments

Get the answers to the questions down on a  piece of paper and things will seem clearer, If you are still struggling, give me a call on 07973 635102 or fill in the form on the contact page to have a chat with someone who’s been there and will support you through finding the answers.

Until next week

Be yourself!

Dr Bridget

P.S My new FB group called One Step Closer (business success) is up and running and this is your invitation to join and get involved in going for what you want. Click here to join

 

 

Why Being Specific Helps you Get your Goals

Be Specific and You Will Get Your Goals

Be specific

Be Specific

One of the really great things about taking an  NLP course is that you learn all about what the Unconscious (U/C) Mind does and how it functions. It is the driver of your behaviour and is the domain of your emotions so it’s really great to understand it and work with it.   The U/C mind likes clarity – it takes the path of least effort. If you aren’t clear and specific the U/C mind will not know what to do and this can lead to lack of action and anxiety. If you are interested in finding out more click here to find out about my NLP courses.

An example of this taking the path of least effort, is if you just set a goal to earn more money, your U/C mind will then find you a 10p piece on the pavement rather than what you really wanted but haven’t said. If you have any goal and you haven’t been really clear, then the likelihood of you actually achieving your goal is much lower than if you have been specific. Here’s a link to a video about goal setting.

Watch the video below where I talk about this common challenge.

If you aren’t setting effective goals and find yourself procrastinating or getting anxious,  your unconscious mind and conscious mind are probably not aligned, so get in touch via my web site to book an appointment to talk to me and start changing your life today.

Until next week, practice being specific -it works

Dr Bridget

How to say NO to people and why

How to say No to people and why

Just say No

Say No

This is an important topic because if you do say no, you will get:

  • Head space for what really want to do and will be completely in charge of your life

• Real fulfilment and enjoyment of your life with none of these ups and down moments

And if you don’t say no. you will become overwhelmed, have low mood and be kicking yourself when  you wake up in the night with everything going round and round in your head and lose any time you have to look after yourself.

 

What can you say No to? Watch the video below and have a think about what you can take action on.

Say No to

  • Other peoples baggage – moaning, negativity, reasons and excuses
  • Things that make you angry
  • Work that you hate
  • Business processes or relationships that you hate
  • Toxic relationships – here’s a link to a video about my ABCD tool. Mood hoovers are the Ds – They have a different model of the world and that is fine but if its having a negative affect on your health or your emotions, get rid of them or neutralise them- Just say NO
  • Hanging onto the past – Things have happened and you have put things into your head. The past is gone, the present is the present and the future hasn’t happened yet so let go and notice the things that are around you and be present.

Is there anything that I have forgotten? Let me know and also let me know what you plan to do to start saying NO. If you need any help, just go here and book a free session with me to start that journey.

 

See you next week with another prescription for success.

Dr Bridget

How do You “Eat That Frog”? A Time Management tool

Manage Your Time

So many people talk about challenges with Time Management and it is often the biggest reason people give for not achieving and doing the things that they said they’d do. However, I’m sure you are aware that Time Management is actually Self Management!

Brian Tracy wrote a book called “Eat That Frog”. It sounds a bit Yucky! However it’s something that I talk about with all of my clients, my mastermind groups and it’s been a useful reminder for me to look at my list and start doing my time management really effectively.

Frogs vary in size, texture, smell and hairiness, and the tool is based on eating the largest, lumpiest, smelliest and hairiest frog first. The rest of the day then gets better.

Eating Frogs is SO important because it stops you from procrastinating, getting stuck and having loads of excuses and feeling rubbish.  Have a listen to me talking about the tool and using A’s, B’s and C’s.

There’s a tool below the video with a bit of an explanation about ABCs.

 


Here’s a quick lesson on how to “Eat that Frog”

Write a list of everything that you have to do and then sort them into 3 groups

A’s are things that are very important to do today which will help you to reach your goals.

B’s are things that are simply nice to do but you can’t do them until you have done all of your A’s.

C’s are things to delegate to others.

Here’s a quick example  Eat-that-Frog

I’ve filled in some of  my A’s, B’ and C’s on as an example

Happy Frog eating and see you next week.

Dr Bridget