Is Your Head in the Shed?
I said to someone the other day “My head’s in the shed!”
I don’t know if this is a UK expression but we certainly hear a lot of this statement in Wales.
When we say, “My head is in the shed,” what do we mean?
It’s an interesting metaphor and in this week’s Prescription for Success I discuss what we mean by this statement and how we can help ourselves. Watch the video and let me know what you think.
“My head is in the shed!” – What do we mean by this statement?
Do we mean that we are confused, that we are stressed, disorientated or overwhelmed? There is no real answer because when we say it we have our own reasons for saying it.
If your head is in the shed then it’s separate from the rest of you and you feel that you need to look for it as it’s important to you.
You may consider the reasons why your head is in the shed.
For me, I think it was because I was a little overwhelmed and had a lot going on for me. So I went to stopped and considered what the problem was and what I needed to do to deal with the overwhelm and gave someone a ring for some help.
If your ‘head is in the shed’ then look for the reasons and ask for help if you are not able to get your head out of the shed because being in the shed isn’t the best place, is it?
If you need some help with this then get in touch with me because we can get this sorted easily so that you can move forward with you head in the right place
Dr Bridget – with my head in the right place.
P.S. I’m running an NLP course in February/March 2022 – a great way to get to know yourself and increase your confidence in working with others. Here’s a link to the course information where you can also download a brochure for dates and prices.
How to be successful in networking.
This week’s prescription follows on from last week’s where we were discussing consciousness. If you bring consciousness into your networking then you will be successful.
In this week’s Prescription for Success, I share with you some top tips on how to get the best out of networking and be successful. Watch the video and try the tips for yourself.
The three Cs for Networking
One of the ideas that I use in networking is by using the “3 Cs ”
1. Having Clarity – This is the offering, who you are looking for and what you are going to say.
2. Connections – Being yourself, showing up as yourself and really wanting to get into rapport.
3. Consistency – Showing up at the networking event and then following up.
Being successful at networking events is really about habits. Here are some more tips:
- Stay visible by engaging and having 1:1s with people.
- Ensure that whoever refers to you are kept updated on what has happened.
- Ask for the business – people sometimes stop short at this point, they build up an amazing rapport and don’t follow through and ask for a sale.
- Be organised.
- Look out for others and give back.
While this is a more practical Prescription it’s also about being present while you are networking and having that best intention for other people and this will get you success in networking.
I’d like to network with any of you, it’s great to get to know people, so get in touch with me because there is always something good that can happen as the result of a chat.
ooking forward to chatting with you.
Dr Bridget – looking forward to chatting with you.
P.S. I’m running an NLP course in November from the 5-8th plus 26-29th – a great way to get to know yourself and increase your confidence in working with others. Here’s a link to the course information where you can also download a brochure for dates and prices.
When is the Best Time to Work
You know how it feels, when you don’t have the energy to do the work you really need to do, and think – I wish I’d done that this morning. When you are trying to keep your eyes open in the middle of the afternoon?
Daniel Pink- the American Author and speech writer for Al Gore, tells us that our brains are fairly hard wired for when we have the energy to do focused work and when it is time to do creative work. Also that, if we understand that, our productivity doubles. Eighty percent of us are larks and work efficiently in the morning, he says – here is the article.
Watch the video and then have a think about how you use your time to do which sort of work:
When do you feel most energised?
My focus and productivity is best in the morning
It’s worse in the evening – get me to six o’clock and I’m nearly asleep.
Daniel Pink says if you you want to do things where its important not to be distracted, do it in the morning – examples are in the video and include surgical operations.
To work effectively, easy and creative tasks are best done in the early afternoon. Your brain will fill in the gaps apparently when you sit there and reflect and become creative.
If you have to focus and take action at a time when you are less focused, stand up and change your physiology – if you remember, changing our physiology changes our emotional state which changes our reality.
Get your peak state at the end of the day – your brain will make sure that you will have a good day the next day.
Have a think and fill your calendar with things that are most appropriate for the time of day and try not to do surgical operations in the early afternoon.
Let me know how your ability to work effectively changes as you fit your diary to the work that you need to do.
Also, if you are struggling with energy and motivation , get in touch. There may be reasons that are causing this , that are not to do with the time of day.
Until next week
Dr Bridget, Doing Work to Inspire you.
Hello – I’m wondering if you are aware that most of behaviours are unconscious? Also our emotions are created by our unconscious mind- it’s difficult to be sad just by deciding to be.
Moving on from this we can accept that our unconscious behaviours will either get us the result that we want or one that we don’t want. So if we make our unconscious behaviours conscious, then we can start to notice patterns and change them consciously
Have a watch of the video and then reflect below:
Behaviours that are often an issue for people include:
And many more
In my book, Mindset for Business Success, one of the techniques I suggest as a time management tool will help to make our behaviours conscious.
- List everything (and I mean everything) that you do for a whole day.
- Go through the list when you have finished and think about your goal. Work out which are helpful and which aren’t helpful.
- Notice any patterns that are helpful or not helpful
- Raise your awareness until your unconscious behaviours are conscious
- Repeat weekly until you are consciously aware of what is happening
If you have anything going on in your behaviour that is not useful and you can’t resolve it, get in touch! It takes 63 days to resolve a minor habit or pattern consciously but if you work with your unconscious mind, it takes less than an hour. If the pattern is a deep emotional pattern, it is also easy to rewire that thinking, so get in touch. My 1:1 coaching and my NLP training are both very effective.
Until next week
Dr Bridget – helping you work with your unconscious mind
Why is Consistency Important?
Hi. I expect you’ve noticed that if you aren’t consistent in your behaviour or what you say, then you get different results. This may well be fine, however- there are certain situations where consistency is important.
I’ve used a dog training example in this video and it equally applies to our business results and results in life and relationships.
For example, if we do social media, then it’s more effective to be consistent with your posts and videos and communication as it gets people to know who you are and expect you to show up on a regular basis.
Watch the video and let me know what you think.
So, I’ve been taught that shouting for my dog by his name and then rewarding him works really well as you’ve seen. I get frustrated by my husband who will the shout “come on” and then may be the name and then whistle and forget to reward him when he works out what’s expected. No consistency!
My question to you, is:
How consistent are you in repeating things that you know works – that’s in your business, in your life, in your career or in a relationship?
Be honest- give yourself a score on the scale of 0-10 where 0 is “I’m a nightmare, I’m not consistent at all to 10, which is, I’m wonderful, I do everything consistently and it works.
How would it be if you could choose one area to improve your consistency in and monitor the results?
Let me know if you need any help – I do a free session to look at what’s happening and what I can help you change to become consistent – There’s usually a root cause!
Until next week
Dr Bridget, putting out a blog every week for your benefit
I’ve been there and done this – I still remember sitting in my log cabin 9 years ago, wondering whether I was good enough or whether I wasn’t. And sometimes I did and sometimes I didn’t.
Moving from being a respected GP to a Trainer and Coach was something that I thought would be easy – at a conscious level- but my unconscious mind had other ideas – “WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? – DON’T BE SILLY!!!!!” was the constant shouty negative chatter.
There was a battle going on in my head!
And it’s something I help people with on a regular basis. Click here if you know this is you and want help.
The thing is, when you have a battle in your head, it means that you can’t focus, you can’t do what you want to do and therefore can’t get the results you want. Congratulations if you have overcome this, and if you haven’t you are not on your own.
Watch the video and then consider whether you have this conflict.
We call this conflict “Parts” in NLP terminology and you will hear people talking about part of me this and part of me that on a regular basis – they are torn.
Parts come from significant emotional events and form a part of your unconscious mind which has its own values, beliefs, opinions and behaviours which seem to conflict with the rest of the unconscious mind- hence causing a battle.
The part has a boundary and NLP techniques can be used to get rid of this boundary and therefore the part disappears. Cool stuff eh! And it doesn’t take long and you end up with a lovely peaceful head with no battles.
So how would it be if you get rid of the conflict that may be causing issues in your business, your life, your health and your relationships? If that’s of interest to you, let’s have a chat – either 1:1 work or an NLP course will sort it out.
Also, if you are a coach and fancy being able to do this with your clients, you can come and learn these techniques on an NLP Practitioner course. Just let me know.
Until next week,
Dr Bridget – making you whole again.
Other People’s Stuff
I was in a networking group the other day and a former client, who is in a really good head space, was talking about how she needed to expand her business. People gave their views and advice and – possibly a mind read – this left the person feeling a bit bemused and I don’t think it really fitted with what she felt she needed. It didn’t fit with her Model of the World.
This person was an example of being in a place where they were happy and content and had plans which they know they were are going to achieve, and were then being gifted other people’s beliefs and priorities – their stuff. I didn’t talk to her about it but did say generally that sometimes we need to make our own decisions about what works best for us. Watch the video below and reflect on what I am saying:
People want to help and that’s brilliant. They have their own rules, judgements and values and think of it as a gift and, here’s the thing – you can either accept the gift but you don’t have to accept it.
Everyone has a different model of the world – here’s an interesting video of how that happens – and sometimes we just need to stick to what is working for us. Our emotional energy can be lowered by what other people say and if that happens a lot, then it would be good to put some boundaries in. I call these people mood hoovers – you know who they are.
REMEMBER – if your Model of the World, your behaviours and the results that you get, work for you, then carry on and enjoy the results!
If you are having wobbles as a result of other people’s perspectives and you want to instead be in charge of your own life and your results let me know. Often people feel that they can’t get there on their own – I’m known as the Chief Unsticker, and I can help.
Book an appointment with me for a free chat or fill in the form on my web site and lets have a chat about it – I probably have the answer for you.
People become in charge of their life by working with me in a variety of ways so have a look at my web site and discover the possibilities. I’ve listed them below:
- Breakthrough 1:1 Coaching
- NLP training courses
- My Mastermind group called STRETCH
- My One Step Closer face Book Group
Until next week,
Dr Bridget – supporting you to be in charge of your life
Delegation – Reasons to do it
Delegation is very much about mind set. We often get to the stage where we are overwhelmed because of our success or our “busyness” or because of our worry about giving things to other people:
- Will they do a good job?
- Will they do it as I want to do it?
- Will it have an effect on my business in a bad way?
- What if I don’t reach my target because it all goes wrong?
And here’s the thing – Not delegating can cause us to take our eye of the goals that we want to achieve because we can’t focus and we get ineffective.
And it can stop us living in our zone of genius- a term from the book called “The Big Leap” by Gay Hendricks – a highly recommended read.
I often talk about this in my mastermind groups because as people and businesses grow and life gets really busy, it’s something that can help people to take a step back and think more about their life and business and just create that space to flourish.
Sometimes people have delegated in the past – myself included- and it’s not worked out. And it can put you off.
Sometimes we delegate the wrong things and don’t realise until it has gone wrong.
Have a watch of the video beow and then use the tool that I have given you below
I have attempted many times to delegate and now delegate my account, some of my Social Media, my videoing, my web tasks – oh and the cooking! It has taken some time and been painful , but I have now grown my business by finding the right people to do these things.
So if you think that you want to do or should delegate, there are 3 things to ask yourself:
- What shouldn’t I be doing?
- What can’t I do?
- What don’t I want to do?
Brainstorm the answers to these three things and then pick one thing to delegate this month and just do it.
If you are struggling to do this becuase your unconscious mind, which is there to keep you safe is bipping away in your ear going “It will all go wrong”, “I can’t trust other people”, or No-one does it as well as me”, then book a free half hour session or send me a message on my contact page and let’s talk about it!
Go from Overwhelm to underwhelm and Freedom
Go from Lack of focus to being totally Focused
Go from Doubt and stuck to Certainty and Freedom
Go from Not reaching your Goals to Reaching your Goals
Until next week,
Dr Bridget, delegating your success to you!
Really Understanding Goal Setting
We’ve all been there – we set goals at various times of the year and then expect them to miraculously happen and that’s because we haven’t set them properly. Your conscious mind sets goals but it is your unconscious mind that gets them and that’s really important because your unconscious mind is there to protect you and if it has any doubts or is unclear about the goal in any way, it’s not going to happen. Watch the video and then set a goal for yourself for this time next year.
The important things to consider as you write your goal are:
- Projecting yourself into the future – your unconscious mind will think that it is real when you say “It’s the 1st February 2020 ( or whatever the date will be ) and I am ………..
- Make the goal positive – what you want rather than what you don’t want
- Make sure that you can start the goal and maintain it. If someone else is part of how you get your goal and they change their mind, you will not get your goal, so set a goal that is your part of it
- Be specific – your unconscious mind is generally lazy and will be do the minimum if you don’t specify what you really want.
- Involve all your senses – write down what you feel, what you see, what you hear and what you say to yourself when you have the goal
- Make sure it is ecological – so is it OK in your world for you to have this goal? If I put that I was going to travel the world, then it would not be ecological because I like my home and want to be there.
- Make sure that it increases choice for you
- Make sure that is is a whole life goal – it includes all aspects of your life that are important to you.
And then every day ask yourself these 2 questions – What did I do yesterday to get my goal? and what will I do today to get my goal?
I’ve attached a pdf here – Goal setting – which includes how to set a goal and also my most recent goal
So create a goal as soon as you can and if you have any difficulty doing that, either because you don’t understand the process, or you have doubts, get in touch and we can do a free 1/2 hour to find out how to overcome the blocks.
If you’d like to join my STRETCH mastermind to help you get these goals, have access to experts and accountability, the details are here.
Until next week- Make this your best year yet!
Dr Bridget – setting goals with ease
Role Models – A Different Perspective
I was recently running an NLP Master Practitioner course and we were talking about modelling – this is where NLP has come from – Modelling excellence. Its a key part of the course. Click here for more information about NLP courses
We do a project on my Master Practitioner course where we model a skill that someone has, by eliciting that person’s values, beliefs and strategies and then installing these in ourself – a much quicker way of effecting change than being taught.
Unusually, people on the course were struggling with who to have as a Role Model and I had to agree – I don’t really have one myself (apart from Princess Di). I spent some time wondering who I respected enough to want to change to become like them.
And then I had a light bulb moment – I thought that perhaps I could become my own Role Model and become one for other people. It led to a consideration of what qualities I would like to have that other people and myself might respect- have a watch of the video and then answer the questions below it for yourself.
The qualities that I’d like to improve or develop in myself are:
- Having an interest in people and things- doing pretty well with this
- Making a difference to people- definitely something that’s key for me and I am doing that
- Being myself, which includes making sure I “tick” my values, keep my boundaries, as and the same time, be flexible to enable other people’s models of the world- I’m mainly doing this
- Taking action and being determined- doing this most of the time
- Self care – important in my journey through this life and something that I’ve been working on this year
Next year, I want to improve my capability to ask for help – I think this is part of self-care and not something that comes easily to me. It would make a huge difference to my life and a behaviour that I encourage in my clients – so I’m committing to do that. It will make me a better Role Model
Questions for you:
- What qualities would you look for in yourself, to be your own and others’ Role Model?
- What would you change to get these (if anything) ?
- Is it OK to be a Role Model for yourself and others?
Once you have decided whether you need to change anything, post in the comments, and as always, let me know here if you need to talk through anything.
Until next week
Dr Bridget – being the best Role Model I can be.
Have I lost the plot? Mole hills?
OK- so I’m known for being a bit different and even odd (nicely odd) at times! I was filming some prescriptions for success in my garden recently and noticed there were lots of mole hills – which is slightly frustrating as I thought they had moved over to the park on the other side of the river. Anyway, I like to take opportunities to film something a bit different and it got me thinking – “What is the purpose of a mole hill?” So I looked it up and apparently, moles have a system of tunnels, which I guess I already knew, and the reason for making a mole hill is that when it rains, all of the moles’ food (worms and such like) goes to the surface and they end up having to also come to the surface in order to survive. Thats really interesting and has made me more tolerant of the mole hills. And I thought – maybe this could be looked at as a metaphor for ourselves.
Maybe, we can bury ourselves underground and feel safe and secure but sometimes we need to poke our head up above our comfort system in order to survive and thrive. I wonder if moles feel uncomfortable doing this? I have a cat who has bought moles into the house and can be seen sitting by a mole hill listening intently for any movement.
Have a watch of my video below and ask yourself the questions underneath.
Ok – so not my best video but it does raise some questions:
- Should I stay subscribed to this web site? Thats not a serious question by the way- of course you will – lots of new things coming soon!
- Where are you at your most comfortable – in your tunnel system or poking your head out of your comfortable place in order to survive?
- Do you have a system that you function best in or do you need to find one where you can stay comfortable and survive and thrive?
If you would like a chat to me, either to tell me that was a bit weird or to get some help in surviving and thriving, click here
I also have 2 places left on my NLP Practitioner Course in January – find out more here – it gives you a system to grow and become totally excellent rather than getting stuck in tunnels
Until next week, happy digging