Do you allow yourself to be supported?
Do you allow yourself to be supported by yourself or by others?
It’s been a tricky year with COVID and I think people’s mental health hasn’t perhaps been as good as it was before. Sometimes I hear people say “there is no one around to talk to anymore”.
Things happen around us and we start to get some negative chatter in our head. We feel that we need support but, here’s the thing, could we take care of ourselves?
How about supporting ourselves first?
When I’ve asked for help from others sometimes they are busy, or sometimes they just give advice and it doesn’t necessarily help. So, I think the important thing is to care of yourself and be ok with being on your own, be ok with just being yourself.
Watch this week’s video and then complete the tasks below
- Take a look at your strengths
- What are your strengths?
- Make a list of your strengths.
- Look at the people in your life
- Are they the right people?
- Do they listen to you or not?
- Are they enabling you or just thinking about themselves?
- Recognise any patterns of internal chatter that’s going on in your head
- Write your negative chatter thoughts down
- Then be aware that you are actually worth a lot more than you think.
These actions will allow you to support yourself and what usually happens is that other people then turn up to help you as well. When you think about it, what you put out there is what you get back- It’s called Perception is Projection in NLP. So, if you’ve got doubts and negative emotions then you get doubt and negative emotions back. Alternatively if you’re ok with yourself people will be around for you.
If you are struggling with any of this, if you don’t think you are worthy or you’ve got a lot of negative chatter that stops you supporting yourself, or you think that you are just a victim with others being responsible for your emotions, then get in touch this can all be sorted out in just a few hours. Then you can truly live the life you want.
I hope you do that – look after yourself and support yourself in the best way that you can.
Until next week
Dr Bridget- helping you to lead a life where you support yourself.
P.S I’m booking people into my next Certified NLP Practitioner course in July/August.
Does making judgements help us?
This blog came about because I noticed that I was surrounded by people, whether on Social Media or in everyday life, who were judging other people. Now I’m asking myself as well, am I judging those who are judging others. So I have considered that as well, as I recognise that what we perceive as coming back to us is actually what we are putting out.
I recently noticed that lots of people were actually using their energy in a negative way to judge others when they could have been using their energy more positively. So, are you using your energy to judge others or are you simply interested in people and enjoying seeing how everyone is different? Indeed, the latter position is the stance I prefer to take.
Watch this week’s video and have a think about your stance on this.
Now, in terms of the Neuro Linguistic Programming’s Communication Model, to be able to use the amazing amount of information surrounding us, we need to generalise and label things and that can turn into judgements.
Moreover, the presuppositions of NLP, which are the assumptions that we use in everyday life, which apply to this scenario are:
- People aren’t their behaviour so the identity of a person is not what they are doing as a behaviour.
- People are doing the best they can with all their available resources
- Everyone has a different model of the world
We can adopt these presuppositions and get really interested in people and also get rid of any negative anchors we have from the past. Those anchors may have been triggers for us to get emotionally involved and make judgements and if we get rid of them, we can then use our energy in a more positive way.
So if you find yourself doing a lot of judgement then get in touch. We can use a tool called Time Line Therapy which gets rid of all the negative emotions which are anger, sadness, fear, hurt or guilt and any limiting decisions that you have about yourself or other people. Then life gets really interesting. You can have your own opinions and beliefs and just get on with your life to get your goals instead of worrying about about other people are doing.
So are judgements useful? We need some but what do you think?
Until next week
Dr Bridget- helping you to lead a peaceful life.
How do You Maintain Your Boundaries?
Hi – This prescription is something that I talk to my 1:1 clients about and those on my courses. This is because you can be in a really positive place and then something will lower your mood and undo all of the personal development that you have undertaken. And it’s important for you to consider boundaries as well!
First you need to know what a boundary is. A boundary is something that stops you from feeling positive and stops you from going where you are going. It can either be a person or an environment or something that you see on social media or the news. Maybe watching politics or disasters on the news or going to a networking event where you feel uncomfortable could be a boundary. I also know that there are people who suck my energy out of me- I call them mood hoovers- and they are boundaries for me.
Watch the video and then read under the video to decide what your boundaries are and how to keep them.
- What are your boundaries?
- If you don’t know, make a list
- Notice when you feel glum or your mood lowers
- Let people know what your boundaries are.
- Let go of the fear about telling people and if you can’t maybe they are a boundary.
Let me know if you can’t put a boundary in or can’t tell people about them as there is a liklehood that they will stop you achieving what you want to achieve. And at some stage in the future you will wish you had been firmer and put thoat boundary in.
Until next week,
Dr Bridget – helping you to get where you want.
P.S We are now booking for the next NLP courses whcih are in 3 months time
Hi everyone – let me ask you some questions:
- Are you sitting there thinking that you are too busy to meet up with positive people who would support you in your life, business or career?
- Do you have people surrounding you that are mood hoovers and drag your mood down?
- Are you making excuses to avoid going out and getting that support which would help you to be positive, motivated and full of energy?
This is what I think – I could be sitting doing my business, writing blogs, seeing clients or people that are interested in me supporting them and, as a result, forget to interact with positive people. I don’t in general have people who lower my mood around me as I have taken action to either change them to positive support or removed them from my life – sounds a bit harsh doesn’t it – but its part of keeping myself in a good space. Here’s a link to my ABCD tool coaching video which helps you to “sort” the people around you.
Watch this video and then take any action that you need to to.
So what is your gut feeling about your positive support? Do you need more or do you have the right people around you?
If you need more, who would they be? Get a piece of paper and start to make a list. Watch the ABCD coaching video on my Mindset for Success course. You can test people out to see if they are truly supportive or not.
Make a list of what you want to talk to people about and run past them and also what you can do for them.
If you need any positive support and would like to interact with me on a regular basis book an appointment to talk to me and also join my closed FB group called One Step Closer by clicking here.
It makes all the difference!
Until next week, go find and find those people and let me know how you are doing.
And if you want more tools to support you to get success, then find out more about my Mindset for Success course which gives you so much more and is till at an introductory price.