Posts

labellling

Does Labelling Yourself Affect Your Results?

Labelling yourself – does it help?

labellling

What’s your Label?

Labelling is needed to cope with the vast amount of information that we have coming into our senses. If we don’t label things, we don’t know how to deal with them or what sort of behaviour we need to do to go with the label. However it sometimes is unhelpful to label things or yourself – as this blog will show you.

I was recently working with someone who had some challenges with his mindset for success, relating to things that has happened to him previously in his life. We had got rid of his negative emotions and he was doing well. However, what we hadn’t dealt with was that his dad was a hard worker and my client had labelled himself as a type A personality. Hard working, striving, life imbalance and tendency to over-react sort of sums up the characteristics of an A type personality.

So he determinedly  labelled himself as an A person and therefore his behaviour went with that and eventually he hit a brick wall and spent 6 weeks in bed. It was very upsetting to hear about it, for his wife, his kids and his associates.

When we talked it became obvious that he was having a big conflict. Part of him thought he was an A type personality and  part of him wanted to be a B type personality – much more laid back and relaxed. This conflict got bigger and bigger and he eventuallly hit that brick wall. Watch the video where I talk about this conflict

As we explored the conflict, he realised that he could acually do both and that the purpose of the brick wall was to protect him while he sorted out the conflict.

Using an NLP technique called Parts Integration which gets rid of the conflict, he has now rediscovered his mojo and is enjoying his business and a balanced life.

I’d like to ask you:

Have you labelled yourself as anything unhelpful?

If so, have a careful think about it and either relabel yourself give me a ring if you are struggling with internal conflict.

Until next week, have a balance in your life!

Dr Bridget

An Effective Way to Deal with Anxiety

Anxiety can be disabling and cause you to get stuck

I’ve had quite a lot of phone calls recently from people who are feeling anxious. Sometimes they are on medication and have tried many ways to reduce the anxiety but it doesn’t seem to be doing the trick.

While it may be controversial to many who think that it is a medical condition and can’t be solved simply, I believe that it is easy to solve in many cases. After all, my experience as a GP versus how I help people now says that this is the case for many! Tad James, the founder of the American Board of NLP, says:

“Anxiety is a sign that the unconscious mind is not really focusing on what it really wants”

People with anxiety often have reasons or excuses as to why they can’t do what they really want and therefore become anxious. People also “label themselves” as anxious people and this doesn’t help as they then live their life expecting to be anxious. And they find it difficult to make decisions.

What if everyone could design their future by letting go of unhelpful and limiting things from the past and become happy??

Now there’s a thought!

Well that’s what I can help with, so watch the video below and click here to download the pdf of my book which discusses how to set goals and create your future. It’s called Mindset for Business Success and equally applies to Mindset for Life Success.

If you think that the anxiety in your life, or someone who you know, is causing you, or them, to be stuck and unhappy, click here to schedule a  free 30 minute telephone consultation so I can help.

After all, we only have one life and I want to help you live it!

Until next time, keep happy,

Dr. Bridget

When it all gets too much!

Is it All Too Much?

Recently a client was due to meet me and didn’t turn up (unusual) and it turned out that she had fallen asleep-her brain had just given up because there was just too much in her head. The issue was that she had too much in her head.

She had done some amazing work in breakthrough coaching with me and on NLP courses and was “transitioning” to doing what she really wanted to do. And of course there was still a mortgage to pay, bills to pay and holidays to take. It was all buzzing round in here head and it all got too much.

Watch the video to listen to what we talked about and the read about the tips I gave her underneath the video.

Make sure you have watched the video to get the tips in more detail.

Tip 1
Think about the bigger purpose of what you are doing and just check that your actions still tick your purpose

Tip 2
Do a brain dump to get things out of your head – write down absolutely everything that you have to do in any part of your life. Don’t judge the list -it may run to 3-4 pages. You can then start to group and prioritise

Tip 3
Get into peripheral vision -there is an explanation of how to do that on the video
It cuts down your negative chatter and you feel calm

Tip 4
Step out of your body and “watch yourself -like a fly on the wall” you’ll be amazed at much information you’ll get about what you are doing. It’s a dissociated state and therefore any negative emotions will disappear

If it’s all too much for you then book a free appointment to talk to me and become calm and focused on what you want in your life, business, career. Because you are worth it and I’d like to support you in your journey.

Here’s a  link to the Work With Me page and my next NLP course is 19-22nd October 2018 plus 9-12th November 2018. A truly life changing course with 2 spaces left!

Catch up next week

Dr Bridget

Say NO

The Perils of Saying Yes All the Time

If you mean to Say NO and Say YES, then there may be consequences for you!

Say NO

Say No when you mean it

One of the main reasons that people come and see me for coaching is when they find they say yes when they want to say no. Its really interesting to think about why we do this (and I think most of us do to some extent)

  • Maybe we are people pleasers?
  • Maybe we want to be liked?
  • Could we be afraid  of the consequences?
  • Most likely, we are mind-reading what people would say or do?
  • Maybe things have happened to us in the past which makes us worry about the consequences of saying no?

And what are the consequence when we don’t say no?

  • Generally we feel uncomfortable
  • Anxiety kicks in when we are not being true to what we want
  • Then we can lose confidence, end up in a vicious circle and then start saying yes even more!

Watch the short video below and then read the tips underneath that will make you think and perhaps do things differently.

If any of this sounds familiar to you and you want to start to say no, here are some things that you could do:

  • Stop and think about when you do it
  • Say to the person, let me have a think about it
  • Take a step back and think about why you are doing it and whether it’s in line with your values and being yourself
  • Ask yourself what’s important to you about being you
  • Say no if that’s what you’ve decided, explain the reasons and how saying yes is making you feel. You can always find a great way of saying it!
  • Move on

If the person is unhappy, then maybe you need to move on from them???? – Just saying -and I know it depends who they are. – I’m an expert in mending relationships if you still want to keep them.

You could also take some responsibility for having said yes in the past – maybe the person is confused?

How about saying something like this – “I’ve always wanted to have a great relationship with you and I haven’t always been totally honest with myself and have said yes when instinctively I have wanted to say no. I’ve realised now what I’m doing and I apologise for any confusion I’m causing. I hope you understand and that we can still have a good relationship”

Enjoy reflecting on this week’s blog! If you want some support to make changes, give me a ring on 07973 635102 or get in touch here 

See you next week!

Dr Bridget

Team

What makes a great team?

What makes a great team?

Team

Team work

As you go about your life on a day to day basis and you look around, you will realise that you have more than one team around you. These  may be in your business, in your career, in your social life or  your leisure activities. Sometimes these will work well for you and sometimes they won’t. And often, it’s a gut feeling that tells you whether it does or not.

The definition of a team is “at least 2 or more members who get together with a common purpose to reach a goal and solve problems”.

Perhaps ask yourself – how do you know what makes a good team for you?

Sometimes its about having complimentary skills – for instance, I’m not a detail person so I have those to help me, which is helpful. In other instances it’s about making sure that the team feels right for you.

It also links with my ABCD tool which makes sure that you have positive committed support around you.

Watch the video below and have a reflect about whether you need to change your team or celebrate the fact that  you are pulling in the same direction.

Sometimes we have people around us who don’t have that same purpose and just feels wrong. We often ignore our gut instinct and carry on regardless, often with disastrous results. So have a think, watch my ABCD video and either relax because you have the right people, or change the people around you. Remember that you are the sum of the 5 people around you.

If you’d like to talk about your team to someone who is independent and interested in you doing the best you can in your business or life,contact me for a free consultation.

See you next week!

Dr Bridget