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Wobbles

5 Ways to Stop Wobbles

Hands up – Who has Wobbles?

Wobbles

Wobbles

I certainly have them and so do my clients.

In fact, I’d go as far as saying that probably everyone has them!

I’ve started going to the gym recently – a part of my self care – and I overdid the 1st machine and I got off and couldn’t walk – It was actually quite scary. I had this vision of me being carted off to hospital and I felt quite panicky. I think it was because one of my friends had been quite stressed and had retired and had then had a stroke 2 days later – I think I wondered whether the same thing had happened to me.

And  in our life, our relationships, our work or our business, the same sort of feeling can happen and its very uncomfortable.

Listen to the 5 things that you can do when you are having a wobble in the video below:

1. Notice when you have a wobble so that you can start to understand why and to recognise the triggers and patterns that are appearing.

2. Understand your comfort zones –  We all have them. The way that we have been brought up by our parents, teachers and other people who surround us give us that thermostat beyond which we can’t go. Or at least find it uncomfortable to go beyond. The way to overcome the thermostat is to expand our comfort zones so that we feel more comfortable with our thermostat. We are in control of it.

3. Find out and work with your values. For my business, mine are Determination, Self-care, Fun and Making a difference. I have wobbles when I’m not working with these values so I keep them in my conscious mind all the time. Click here to get a values exercise and find out what yours are.

4. Set some compelling goals. Not setting goals means that you are more likely to have wobbles because your U/C  mind doesn’t know what you are doing and you can get anxious as a result.

5. Look at who surrounds you – are they mainly mood hoovers or definite suporters. If you are surrounded by people that drain your energy, you will lose confidence and definitely wobble. Find some true supporters who you can talk to about anything.

If you know where you want to go and what you want to do and your unconscious mind is throwing up all sorts of reasons for not taking the action – usually manifested as negative  internal chatter and the feeling of wobbling, then take some action. If you are still stuck or uncomfortable, then get in touch so that we can sort this out together. Remember that you only have one life and I’d love to help you live it to the full!

Until next week,

Dr Bridget – unwobbling people across the world.

Environment

How Your Environment Affects your Reality

Environment

Chaos or not?

Hello!

I’m known for being slightly disorganised, although not as much as in the picture. And for some reason I allow my environment to be less than useful and don’t do anything about it. This means that my results could be improved if I made a change. Does this apply to you as well, or are you fully in control of your environment?

Robert Dilts – a well known NLP Master Trainer, had a series of tools that allowed us to say at what level change is needed in order to get the results that we want. Environment is one of those levels and it can be about what is around you or the people that are around you. Its a pretty empowering level to make changes at – well it would certainly be empowering for me to change at this level. This is because my behaviour around my environment doesn’t fit with my knowledge and skills, my values and beliefs, or my identity or purpose.  I’m out of line!

Have a watch of the video below and then read further on to see if  you need to change your environment at all.

A positive environment  is different for everyone- it can be chaotic and disorganised and people will be very happy in it or it can be minimalist and they can be unhappy. It also includes the people around you.

My values for my business (click here if you want to work yours out) are determination, self care, fun and making a difference and the disorganisation that I have around me is not helpful in any way. I have people around me that are supportive and positive which is a very helpful environment in that sense.

Have a think about your surroundings and work out if they fit with who you are, what’s important to you  and will get you the results that you want. If not, then do something about it!

I’m happy to have a chat about it if you don’t know how to change your results, so click here to make an appointment or send me a message.

Until next week

Dr Bridget – helping you reflect on your environment.

 

 

 

People pleasing doesnt work

Understanding People Pleasing

People Pleasing

People pleasing doesnt work

Be yourself

This is a really important symptom that I come across regularly on courses and with my one to one clients. They come to me because they realise that that they are not being themselves and that has lots of consequences for them as you will find out when you watch  the video below:

Let’s face it – it is nice to be liked and to be kind and nice to people, isn’t it? However, if it stops you getting your goals and feeling as though you can’t be yourself, then that is a problem. It usually comes from a desire to be liked and included which is often very strong. People want to be in a community and to be respected and liked. They want to belong.

I often find that there are root causes in people’s past that cause people to overdo people pleasing – Do any of the below apply to you or someone you know?

  • Not being listened to when you were growing up
  • Having to hide due to circumstances around you
  • Being bullied
  • A feeling of having to keep the peace when growing up – perhaps your parents arguing or drinking
  • A feeling of guilt if  your parents marriages folded – did I do enough- was it my fault- I didn’t try hard enough
  • Being criticised or not praised during your life
  • And many other events

All the negative emotions that come from incidents above have an impact. As we know, our unconscious mind is there to protect us and we carry on people pleasing as a result. It leads to a feeling of worthlessness, confusion and hurt and these feelings stop us from reaching our full potential, being who we want to be, doing what we want to do and having what we want to have.

It can be a difficult habit to break unless you get help from someone like myself. The wiring that causes us to people please, to our detriment, can be reversed very quickly with Time Line therapy (R)

What can we do about this?

  1. Put your own oxygen mask on – you can’t help others unless you help yourself!
  2. Notice when you are people pleasing and the impact that it has on you and your feelings, actions and your goals
  3. Remind yourself that there are root causes for this – you may know what they are or you may not but there will always be one- a decision that you made at some stage in your life that you have to keep people happy.
  4. Decide to be happy and to be yourself
  5. Surround yourself with people who will support you

If you find  you can’t resolve this and you want to resolve this, then get in touch with me to take advantage of a free call.

My NLP Training courses and my one to one coaching will solve this problem and others like it for you and you can then live the life that you want to live – after all, we only have one life.

Until next week

Dr Bridget – Helping you put your own oxygen mask on

 

Be happy, be yourself, If not give me a call

Uni-tasking

The Importance of Uni-Tasking

The Importance of Uni-tasking

Uni-taskingHere are my thoughts on multi-tasking versus uni-tasking for your reflection. I work with a lot of people in business who think that multi-tasking is a skill and I am going to disagree as you will find out.

This morning, I had many things to do:

I did little bits of many things and  got overwhelmed and stuck – literally. “That’s no good for a Chief Unsticker” I thought, so I took a step back, got my planner out and made a list. Watch the video to find out what else I did.


Having decided what I needed to do and checked that all of my actions were getting me towards my goals, I started with a technique called the Pomodora  Technique. It’s come from cooking Italian tomatoes and the main points about it are that:

  • You do one thing at a time
  • Turn off distractions and set a timer
  • You do it for 20 minutes and then have a 2 minute break
  • You repeat this for 3 cycles and then have a longer break – say 1/2 hour

Then you repeat it.

I get loads done while I’m doing this – in fact I’m using it to write this blog!

Give it a go and if you find yourself becoming Overwhelmed and Stuck get in touch to have a chat with me – I do a free session for half an hour to find out what the problem is and work out what help you need.

Until next week

Dr Bridget – turning off overwhelm

P.S if you’d like to join my STRETCH mastermind group, let me know – my next intake is in March for 5 people only

 

 

Adversity

Adversity – Does it stop you?

How do you react when adversity comes along?

Does it stop you?

Adversity

Adversity

One of the themes of Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP) focuses on whether you are getting results or giving yourselves reasons why you can’t do whatever it is.

I find there are so many people who come and see me, wanting to get unstuck, or get more success or happiness, that have a huge amounts of reasons and excuses why they can’t. Adversity can happen and it’s how you deal with it that matters – its about resilience.  A minor example is when I wanted to do the videos today, it was going to rain and be cloudy. And I feel as though I have a cold coming on. So I got my wellies and my umbrella and told my unconscious mind that it it wasn’t convenient to be unwell. I know what my goals are and part of them is spreading the word and supporting people to get unstuck and because of that, the videoing was going to happen no matter what.

Watch the video (sorry about the expression) and then ask yourself the questions underneath.

  • Do you have goals?
  • Do you have reasons or excuses why adversity gets in the way?
  • Are you resilient?
  • Whats stopping you – big things or small things?

If you know what they are and you can’t do anything about them consciously,  book a free session here so that we can clear the reasons and excuses and head you for your goals!  

Coming on an NLP course will help you to get rid of the reasons and excuses and become resilient, as well as giving you some amazing communication and resilience skills for your self and others. One of my Master Practitioner trainees has just landed a 7 book contract and has the opportunity to run retreats abroad in the next year! And a year ago she was unwell and not focusing on her future at all. It’s totally amazing watching her fly!

Express an interest in coming on a course here.

Until next week, set your goals and overcome the reasons and excuses!

Dr Bridget