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NLP tips to maintain your motivation

Motivation is a very personal thing. What motivates you, whether money, a deadline, penalty or reward may not motivate another person.

Motivation can also vary from day-to-day. One day you can feel highly motivated to do something and next day, before you know it, that motivation has vanished. Read more

Do You Follow Up? Here’s Why You Should.

Following Up – Just Do It

Why aren't you you following up?

Following up

I meet a lot of people who say that they are going to do something and never get around to it, and I find it really interesting to think about why this could be. I’ve been guilty of this myself in the past but now I make sure that following up is a priority, and it has made a huge difference to my business and my mind-set.

People who don’t follow up on actions can come across as a bit disrespectful and it is damaging to the trust that was originally there at the beginning of relationships. Not following up can be detrimental to your business! By not continuing the contact it could mean that you are missing out on a sale, or a lead to something you want to happen!

There is a theme in Neuro Linguistic Programming which says that there are either:

RESULTS or REASONS AND EXCUSES

And I know which I would rather have! Just think of the amount of time that can go into setting up meetings or getting the initial interaction with, only to not follow up afterwards! What a waste!

I usually find that my clients have 2 main reasons or excuses for not following up.

Watch my video below where I discuss these reasons and the repercussions they can have!

The reasons why people don’t follow up tend to fall into two categories:

  1. Mindreading – this is when you claim to know what is going on in another person’s head. You think that you might contact them at an inconvenient time or that you are bothering them or that they are not interested. But – YOU DON’T REALLY KNOW! You are just assuming. These people are may actually be waiting for you to follow up and feel frustrated and annoyed when you don’t.
  2. A limiting belief – this is where you say to yourself “I’ve not got time” or “I’m not that interesting” or “I’m not good enough” or “they will go with another supplier of the service who is better/cheaper than me”. If you don’t believe you have time, then find a way to manage your time more efficiently – could be as simple as buying a diary. If you feel that you aren’t interesting or good enough, this is a much deeper issue, although the fix can be just as quick and easy. I would love to help you, I offer free consultations and we can start changing that mind set together!

So, stop mind reading, believe in yourself, make time and simply follow up – you never know what is waiting on the other end of the phone call!

If you’d like to know more about the themes of NLP, then click here to find a list of the courses I offer.

Until next time – enjoy the rewards of following up!

Dr. Bridget

Communication Can be Frustrating – Here’s a Tool to Help

Communication with others can be frustrating-don’t you think?

Here is one of the reasons why:

Communication

Communication skills

We all have our own comfort zones when it comes to our language and communication, and if others have a different comfort zone, it can often seem as though we are on a “different page”, or in extreme cases, on a “different planet”!!

A large part of my NLP Practitioner courses is spent looking at and analysing the effective use of language and communication. A really fun part of this is what is called chunking. Chunking is the way we organize information in our brains and how we communicate, e.g. big picture or detailed, we all have different levels of chunking and it is also often context specific.

I am often a fairly big picture thinker but then I can get really detailed nearer the deadline for action. If I’m talking to someone who is very detailed at the beginning of a project, I can get a bit frustrated. And I’m sure that if you are detailed, you’d be a bit confused and frustrated by me at times.

In this big old world, we have no control over the type of person we will have to communicate with in our day to day lives, so it is really helpful to learn what to do about mismatching chunk levels and how to utilize them.

If you have a high chunk conversation (big picture), there is much more likely to be agreement with people. If you have a more detailed conversation (low chunk), then there is more likely to be disagreement but there is more opportunity ti solve problems at a detailed level.

Have a watch of the video below and then read the questions that you can use to become more flexible and communicate effectively. Call me if you want to find out more.

Here are some simple questions to use to gain a rapport with someone and to reach an agreement or solve a problem via your communication.

If someone that you are talking to is being very detailed or specific, you can use these questions to chunk up:

  • X for what purpose?
  • What will X give you?
  • What is X and example of?

If you want to find out details or solve a problem, you can chunk down and ask:

  1. X- what specifically?
  2. X – when or how specifically?
  3. What’s an example of X?

For example, is someone is “upset”, you can chunk down by asking “what specifically are you upset by?”

You could also chunk up by asking “What did being upset give you?” and if they say “I defended myself”, you can say “what is the purpose for defending yourself” and they might say “so that I feel safe” and so on.

It’s really interesting and useful.

And if you want to get into rapport with someone, match their chunk size and level of detail or bigger picture thinking.

If you’d like to come on an NLP course to learn more about communication and how you can improve yours, I offer easy monthly payments and a guarantee that you will have fun and learn communication skills with a wide variety of tools. Click here to get in touch.

Please feel free to share – I found out at the weekend that someone got a job as a direct result of watching one of my videos.

That’s my purpose – to make a difference!

Dr Bridget

5 Tips on How To Stop Procrastination-Once And For All

 

How to Stop Procrastination Once and For All – 5 tips 

 

5 Tips for stopping procrastination,once and for all

5 Tips for stopping procrastination,once and for all

Procrastination – One of the biggest challenges my clients have is lack of effective action  which leads to frustration and lack of fulfillment. That’s why they get in touch with me, an NLP and life coach, because they know they need someone to help them to stop procrastination, once and for all. Elsie-Rose was about to write a blog and decided to have a nap instead! What do you do instead of what you need to do? Here are 5 tips for you to consider, reflect on and use  

 

Tip 1

Find your BIG WHY If you find yourself procrastinating and being easily distracted by things that don’t get you to your goal, ask yourself why you want to reach your goal in the 1st place.?What will your goal get you and what will that then get you? I can use myself as an example. When I stopped being a GP, the big why for starting my business was to avoid becoming bored. Now I know that I want to help people to reach their full potential  and also to enjoy every moment of every day –I know that’s my real BIG WHY!! My Purpose!

Tip 2

Make sure  you are motivated by what you want to do Knowing your Big Why for the goal for is a huge motivator and you will also have other things that motivate you (your values). Your goals will then flow towards you  “like butter on a hot crumpet” (a Strictly Come Dancing Quote). My motivators (values) are – enjoying every moment of every day, having fun, developing people and having a purpose. If I make sure that I “tick” those values or motivators, I find that I stop procrastination once and for all. If you are really serious about finding out what  your values are I’ve got a super, no strings attached bonus for you – its a 45 minute free consultation (worth £125) and I’m giving you this free as an ongoing member of my community! Here’s where you can access your free session 

Tip 3

Get a system of planning and prioritising Write down your goal and then ask yourself what needs to be in place for you to reach it, then what needs to be in place for you to reach that etc etc until you get to the 1st thing that you need to do. This is working backwards from your goal and is a very helpful system for planning. An example from my business is – if I want to run another mastermind group as a goal, working backwards, I then need to decide how many people I want for the group, I interview them, I  find them , put a date in the diary, decide what marketing to do and to commit to doing it. So the 1st thing for me is to commit to doing it , then to decide on my marketing, then to put a date in the diary, then find the people, then interview them. I hope that makes sense. Give me a ring if not on 07973 635102

Tip 4

Become efficient Once you know what you have to do, make sure that everything you do is going to move you closer to your goal. There are many systems that you can use – I like Eat  That Frog by Brian Tracy. Do the most important and often the most difficult thing 1st . Only do the things you’d like to do, when you have done the things you have to do. Delegate where possible. 

Work out what your perfect day is and monitor against it. – This is how I do this:-  Write down 5 things that you need to do every day to get you to your goal. Score yourself against it and reflect on your successes and challenges so that you do things consistently and efficiently. Mine would be along the lines of:- 

  •  Get up at 7:30
  •  Work on my business for 90 minutes
  •  Journal
  •  Have fun
  • Celebrate successes at the end of the day

Of course, I’d be seeing clients and networking and growing my list with social media and many other things as well, but if I had to pick 5 things that make a difference, the above would be on my list. How about you? Leave me a comment so that we can share what makes the difference.

Tip 5

Get someone to hold you accountable Hold yourself accountable by using your perfect day tool and journaling. Also feedback to someone that will challenge you if you haven’t done what you said you will do. I have a system of holding clients accountable which I agree with them and then prompt them. If you’d like to talk to me about How to Stop Procrastination, once and for all, access a free session here.

Here’s to no more housework and ironing! Or mowing the lawn or watching telly or some DIY. Unless of course, that’s what your goal is!!!

Till next time, be productive! And many thanks to Elsie- Rose for contributing to my post!

Dr Bridget