Posts

Say NO

The Perils of Saying Yes All the Time

If you mean to Say NO and Say YES, then there may be consequences for you!

Say NO

Say No when you mean it

One of the main reasons that people come and see me for coaching is when they find they say yes when they want to say no. Its really interesting to think about why we do this (and I think most of us do to some extent)

  • Maybe we are people pleasers?
  • Maybe we want to be liked?
  • Could we be afraid  of the consequences?
  • Most likely, we are mind-reading what people would say or do?
  • Maybe things have happened to us in the past which makes us worry about the consequences of saying no?

And what are the consequence when we don’t say no?

  • Generally we feel uncomfortable
  • Anxiety kicks in when we are not being true to what we want
  • Then we can lose confidence, end up in a vicious circle and then start saying yes even more!

Watch the short video below and then read the tips underneath that will make you think and perhaps do things differently.

If any of this sounds familiar to you and you want to start to say no, here are some things that you could do:

  • Stop and think about when you do it
  • Say to the person, let me have a think about it
  • Take a step back and think about why you are doing it and whether it’s in line with your values and being yourself
  • Ask yourself what’s important to you about being you
  • Say no if that’s what you’ve decided, explain the reasons and how saying yes is making you feel. You can always find a great way of saying it!
  • Move on

If the person is unhappy, then maybe you need to move on from them???? – Just saying -and I know it depends who they are. – I’m an expert in mending relationships if you still want to keep them.

You could also take some responsibility for having said yes in the past – maybe the person is confused?

How about saying something like this – “I’ve always wanted to have a great relationship with you and I haven’t always been totally honest with myself and have said yes when instinctively I have wanted to say no. I’ve realised now what I’m doing and I apologise for any confusion I’m causing. I hope you understand and that we can still have a good relationship”

Enjoy reflecting on this week’s blog! If you want some support to make changes, give me a ring on 07973 635102 or get in touch here 

See you next week!

Dr Bridget

How Your Health and Your Results are Affected by the Way you Think

Your Health and Therefore Your Results are Affected by the way That You Think!

Health relates to thinking

Thoughts affect cells

I don’t know if  you’ve been aware of this – its SO important! To have great health which directly affects your results, means that you need to think and feel in a way that enables this. Your reality, which is created by you from the vast amount of information coming into your brain, gives you an emotional state which affects all of your cells in your body. I expect you’ve known people who have felt sad or frightened or guilty by events in their life and they end up by becoming ill. Cancer, High Blood Pressure, Infertility, Depression, and many other “illnesses” – caused by how we think.

All of our cells have all of our memories within them and we switch our genetic information on and off with how we think in general.

Watch the video below and have a think about whether your thinking , feeling and physiology are aligned to create the best results for you or not?


Find out more about this by watching the video explanation of how information becomes thoughts, feelings and affects your physiology and therefore your results. Its known in my circles as my cauliflower video and you can see it here.

I’ve recently worked with quite a lot of people who have results created by their physiology and I’ve even helped someone to get pregnant and have a healthy baby!

We all know that mindset is fundamental to creating and working with illness and getting great results and success, so if you think that you are creating illness or poor results, let me know. Ring me on 07973 635102 or 01656 347027 or fill in a form here to talk to me.

Until next week, create some great thoughts!

Dr Bridget

 

Say NO

What happens if you say YES when you mean to say NO?

If you mean to Say NO and Say YES, then there may be consequences for you!

Say NO

Say No when you mean it

Its really interesting to think about why we do this (and I think most of us do to some extent)

  • Maybe we are people pleasers?
  • Maybe we want to be liked?
  • Could we be afraid  of the consequences?
  • Most likely, we are mind-reading what people would say or do?

And what are the consequence when we don’t say no?

  • Maybe we feel uncomfortable
  • Anxiety kicks in when we are not being ourself – has this happened to you?
  • Then we can lose confidence, end up in a vicious circle and then start saying yes even more!

Watch the short video below and then read the tips underneath that will make you think and perhaps do things differently.

If any of this sounds familiar to you and you want to start to say no, here are some things that you could do:

  • Stop and think about when you do it
  • Say to the person, let me have a think about it
  • Take a step back and think about why you are doing it and whether it’s in line with your values and being yourself
  • Ask yourself what’s important to you about being you
  • Say no if that’s what you’ve decided, explain the reasons and how saying yes is making you feel. You can always find a great way of saying it!
  • Move on

If the person is unhappy, then maybe you need to move on from them???? – Just saying -and I know it depends who they are.

You could also take some responsibility for having said yes in the past and the person may well be confused.

How about saying something like this – “I’ve always wanted to have a great relationship with you and I haven’t always been totally honest with myself and have said yes when instinctively I have wanted to say no. I’ve realised now what I’m doing and I apologise for any confusion I’m causing. I hope you understand and that we can still have a good relationship”

Enjoy reflecting on this week’s blog! If you want some support to make changes, give me a ring on 07973 635102 or get in touch here http://bit.ly/talktoDrB

See you next week!

Dr Bridget

One Effective Way to Deal with Anxiety

Anxiety can be disabling and cause you to get stuck

Let go of Anxiety

Planning helps anxiety

I’ve had quite a lot of phone calls recently from people who are feeling anxious. Sometimes they are on medication and have tried many ways to reduce the anxiety but it doesn’t seem to be doing the trick.

While it may be controversial to many who think that it is a medical condition and can’t be solved simply, I believe that it is easy to solve in many cases. After all, my experience as a GP versus how I help people now says that this is the case for many! Tad James, the founder of the American Board of NLP, says:

“Anxiety is a sign that the unconscious mind is not really focusing on what it really wants”

People with anxiety often have reasons or excuses as to why they can’t do what they really want and therefore become anxious. People also “label themselves” as anxious people and this doesn’t help as they then live their life expecting to be anxious. And they find it difficult to make decisions.

What if everyone could design their future by letting go of unhelpful and limiting things from the past and become happy??

Now there’s a thought!

Well that’s what I can help with, so watch the video below and click here to download the pdf of my book which discusses how to set goals and create your future. It’s called Mindset for Business Success and equally applies to Mindset for Life Success.

If you think that the anxiety in your life, or someone who you know, is causing you, or them, to be stuck and unhappy, click here to get in touch and organise a free consultation so I can help.

After all, we only have one life and I want to help you live it!

Until next time, keep happy,

Dr. Bridget

Don’t stress it!

stress-blogStress is extremely common. It can have physical and psychological effects which generally ‘bring you down’.

Life can be stressful. Whether it’s work, family or money worries, we all have a lot going on in our lives, so it’s no surprise we feel burnt out from time to time. But stress is not good for our emotional state.

Generally, people don’t take measures to reduce stress.  And whilst you can’t stop stress completely, you can learn how to notice the signs and help yourself overcome it. Here are my top tips:

  1. Deep breaths

If you are feeling completely overwhelmed, being able to take your mind out of the situation even for a few minutes can help you relax and gain clarity. When we are anxious or stressed our breathing becomes quick and shallow. Give your breathing your full attention, concentrating on each breath in and out. Take your time to breath in deeply for a count of 7, hold and breath out for a count of 11. Repeat this process until you feel more calm.

  1. Be kind to yourself

Sometimes we are our own worst enemy. Our inner voices can be mean and hurtful. It’s important to recognise this and ensure you are positively reinforcing yourself and how you feel. Treat yourself with kindness, negative thoughts are extremely unhelpful and can do more damage. Tell yourself you’re in control and you’re able to deal with the situation!

  1. Don’t allow yourself to become a victim

Things happen that are out of our control, but by asking “why me?” or “what have I done to deserve this?” only places yourself as a victim. This increases stress and suggests you are unable to change the situation. Instead, recognise this negative thing has happened but tell yourself you are able to turn it around and change it.

  1. Say ‘No’

Not wanting to say no to people is very common. A lot of people have a problem with it as they don’t want to upset someone or let them down. But sometimes you have to put yourself before others. It is impossible to please everyone and trying to do so is a fast track to stress. By saying ‘no’ you are not being selfish, you are just looking after yourself and your mental health. Be honest with people and they will understand.

If you are struggling with stress and feeling unhappy, contact me and I’ll help you overcome your anxiety and emotional state, allowing you to find happiness and at peace with yourself. Click here to book a FREE consultation or call me on: 07973 635102